I’m trying to be a functional human being.
Everything hurts. I’m shuffling around like a little old lady because I don’t have the energy to lift my feet and work is the clusterfuck that keeps on sucking and I just want to disappear to an island in the Caribbean and drink enough rum to kill Captain Jack Sparrow.
I want to write, but all my ideas feel dull and uninspired.
I am trying to appreciate the little things that make it all bearable. But a few kind words scrawled on a mailbox here and there can only be stretched so far.
So I have a favor to ask. ‘Cause y’all are awesome and you make me happy, and I want to give the happy back but I’m stuck and I need some outside motivation.
To that end, I will love you forever if you do one of two things*:
1. Send me adorable dog pictures. Dog pictures make everything better. Cats and bunnies also acceptable.
2. Set me a challenge. Send me a word, topic or question you would like me to write about. Sincere, sarcastic, out there, personal, TMI, WTF…whatever strikes your fancy, and I will make it happen. C’mon. I need a good kick in the ass. You, (yes, you!) could be that kick in the ass.
I guess there’s also option 3, which is to tell me to fuck off and die, but I already have Tumblr for that.
*To clarify, I will also love you forever if you do both things. I would give you a bonus for doing both but unfortunately I don’t know of any way to add more time onto forever, so that’s all you’re getting. Take it or leave it.