1. A domesticated ox native to Asia and Africa, having a prominent hump on the back and a large dewlap. – The Free Dictionary1
2. Tomato, tomahto. – The Nut
1. Nervousness or tension that causes an athlete to fail to perform effectively, especially in missing short putts in golf. – The Free Dictionary1
2. I meant to do that. – The Nut
1. An abnormal fear of dryness and dry places, as deserts. – The Free Dictionary1
2. Oh look, an outdoor sauna. Pass. – The Nut
1. A fanciful creature of undefined nature. – Collins Dictionary1
2. Man, Julie Andrews really took that “the hills are alive with the sound of music” thing to heart. – The Nut
1. To make (someone or something) more lively or vivid. – Merriam-Webster1
2. *currently busy dancing around the living room singing Happy Birthday to herself* – The Nut
1. Clothing or an article of clothing worn next to the skin and under other clothing. – Merriam-Webster1
2. The perfect gift for simultaneously disappointing and insulting someone on a special occasion. – The Nut
1. Time flies (used to draw attention to the rapid passage of time). – Oxford Dictionaries1
2. Latin for “Good god, I’m starting to sound old…” – The Nut
1. A state of freedom from storm or disturbance. – Merriam-Webster1
2. “…” – The Nut
1. A signal to stop, esp. a red traffic signal in a system of traffic lights. – Collins Dictionary1
2. Stop? – Drivers
3. Yes. – The Law
4. Do I have to? – Drivers
5. Yes. – The Law
6. But I don’t want to. – Drivers
7. You still have to. – The Law
8. Are you sure? – Drivers
9. Yes. – The Law
10. Can I get a second opinion? – Drivers
11. No. – The Law
12. Why? – Drivers
13. Because THE FUCKING LAW, that’s why. – The Law
So this just happened:
Needless to say, I’m very disappointed in all of you. Don’t you have anything better to do with your time?
Seriously though, you guys are awesome. I was floored when my followers even hit double digits, and now I’m sub-floored, positively basemented that I’ve managed to hit three digits in less than a year. You all have something very wrong with you, and I love you for it.
I’d love to give you some sort of award for willingly subscribing to my nonsensical ramblings, but all I have to offer is sarcasm and F bombs.
Here, you can all share that silver medal I got the year I didn’t suck quite as badly at skating as usual.
You’ve earned it.