Elsa, you don’t have to put on the red light.

Guys I don’t want to alarm anyone but I have a feeling times are currently tough in Arendelle, because it appears that everyone’s favorite song-belting, snow-golem-building ice queen may have resorted to… *ahem* …alternative means of bringing in revenue to the kingdom.

[insert “frozen assets” joke followed by “ba-dum-tss” here]

I dunno, maybe I’m jumping to conclusions. Maybe Elsa just spent a sweaty half hour in Oaken’s trading post sauna and she needed to cool off.
On top of a culinary school sign.
Near one the busiest tourist spots in Vancouver.
Wearing a come-hither stare and not much else.

It could happen.

Either way, we get it, Elsa, the cold doesn’t bother you. Now go put on some damn pants.




Sunday Sing-along

I had so much fun with Friday’s 12 Days of Nutmas that I’ve decided to go ahead and ruin a few more of your favorite Christmas songs before the big day arrives. So get out your pitch pipes and corkscrews, because today we’re singing…

Let Wine Flow

Oh the weather outside is shitty
‘Cause it’s raining in the city
So crack open the Bordeaux
Let wine flow! Let wine flow! Let wine flow!

Though your family’s being awful
And you’re thinking things unlawful
Before you go striking blows
Let wine flow! Let wine flow! Let wine flow!

If we happen to sober up
How we’ll fester with anger and bile
But with booze brimming in our cups
We’ll take it all with a smile!

And later we’ll slip a fiver
To the designated driver
And we’ll sing in a drunken glow:
“Let it go! Let it go! Can’t hold it back anymo-” “HEY! Can it, Elsa. I thought I told you guys no more goddamn Frozen songs in my car.” “Sorry.”

The hangover never bothered me anyway.