Take your theme and shove it.

So I was happily reading away over at Not A Punk Rocker‘s blog a couple months back, when something terrible happened. She wrote about the Blogging from A to Z Challenge. And if you know me even a little, you’ll know what inevitably happened next.

Goddammit, Sheena.

“CHALLENGE ACCEPTED” was out of my mouth before I knew what was happening. I think I may have had a slight out of body experience then, because although I don’t remember typing anything, suddenly I was over at A to Z headquarters and my blog link had somehow appeared on there with a number next to it and just like that I had committed to twenty-six days of blogging in one month and HOLY SHIT WHAT HAVE I DONE?!

*cue minor meltdown*

But once I managed to crowbar myself out of the little anxiety ball I had instinctively curled into, I took it in stride and began plotting all the alphabetical spam you suckers will have to endure from me during the month of April. Hell yeah, I thought to myself as I proudly surveyed my topic schedule, I am organized as FUCK.

Fast forward to now. When everyone and their Deadpool (goddammit, Sheena) is excitedly talking about “theme reveal day” for the challenge, and I’m like WAIT WAIT WAIT we’re supposed to try and keep 26 posts to one fucking theme?

Oh no sir, no way in Hell’s great torture furnace was that going to work for this nut. Do I not state on my very own About page that this is a no-theme zone?

Then I went back over to A to Z HQ and read their mission statement dealie more closely, and thank sweet Jeebus, the whole theme thing is totally optional and apparently only undertaken as an extra challenge by people who inexplicably like making life harder on themselves.

So never fear, come April 1st this A to Z zaniness is just going to be more of the same old random crap you’ve come to know and kind-of -maybe-love-a-little-but-not-in-a-romantic-way-because-that-would-be-weird.

There’s just going to be a lot more of it.

And if you have a problem with that, just remember that my birthday is in April and that unfollowing me on my birthday will make me sad.

Don’t be a monster. Suck it up for the birthday girl.

That sounded wrong.

I’ll show myself out.

Why I sleep with otters.*

(*Because I don’t have enough weird fetishes represented in my search terms as it is.)

I fail at sleeping.

If there’s one thing I will forever be jealous of, it’s Nutty Hubby’s ability to fall asleep at the drop of a hat. He can nod off in almost any environment, no matter how public, loud or uncomfortable, in five minutes or less.

For me, trying to sleep means it’s time for every little solitary minute detail of the world to come flooding into my head for thorough dissection and analysis; a maze of intrigue created by my brain, to be solved before I am allowed the sweet respite of slumber.

For Nutty Hubby, trying to sleep is…wait, trying? People have to try to sleep? No no no no no. Do or do not, there is no try! LOL BRB ZZZZZzzZZzzzzzzZzzzzzzzzzzzz…

If I didn’t love him so much, I’d hate him.

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